• ThePyroPython@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    This is particularly American sensibility about not drinking alcohol casually around children. It’s very strange. In the UK and Europe, if a kid is having a birthday party at their house it’s completely normal for the adults to be having a casual beer or wine and socialising whilst the children play, obviously not drinking to get drunk and within the legal limits for the driver.

    • Bakkoda@sh.itjust.works
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      1 month ago

      Honestly it’s just pearl clutching. The same people are probably sneaking wine at their 8 year olds little league game in the bubba 64 oz trucker travel tankard.

      • takeda@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        From people close the me, the ones that are MAGA/religious all were actually the most depraved ones when they were younger.

        I don’t know if they think of they have to make it up for those years to still be able to get to heaven or something.

    • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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      1 month ago

      Hiding it from kids obviously will prevent them from ever using it or being curious!

      God forbid we have open and honest conversations with kids so they learn how to use things responsibly.

      • Saleh@feddit.org
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        1 month ago

        Given that alcohol is a hard drug with severe social and personal consequences when abused i find that sentiment a bit shortsighted. We rightfully don’t accept casual consumption of cocaine or heroin around children. We shouldn’t set the model that alcohol is just a casual thing to consume on any given afternoon.

        Me and many friends as teenagers wen we got shitfaced in unhealthy and dangerous ways just laughed at our parents critizising us, because of how normalized their consumption was.

        So between responsible consumption and casual consumption is a huge difference. Especially when there is small kids around, who might end up just drinking from the jar right in their reach.

        • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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          1 month ago

          So hiding it and not telling kids about it is a solution, which makes them curious, and then go eat overboard. Which is what I did.

          What is much better is what Europeans do, where they have a much healthier view of alcohol, grow up around it, know what it is and does, and don’t have nearly the unhealthy binging Americans do. On top of that they also aren’t having an opioid crisis.

          • Saleh@feddit.org
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            1 month ago

            So did you also do other hard drugs because they were hidden from you? Heroin, Coke, Crack, Meth?

            The opiod crisis has an entirely different basis to them, as tons of Americans were made addicted by reckless prescriptions first.

            And again, seeing my and other parents drink regularly did not stop us from being reckless around alcohol. Instead what it does makes clear signs of alcoholism not be taken as warning. “Dad had two beers every day, whats the harm in three?”

            There is things the US does badly, like not allowing alcohol until 21 and then giving access to vodka and beer alike, where many European countries have different ages for booze and lower strength alcohol. But the idea that people in Europe are more responsible around alcohol doesn’t hold to reality. The US had about 120k alcohol related deaths per year, which jumped to 180k with the pandemic. Germany is at a stable 60-70k a year. But Germany has less than one fourth of the US population.

              • Saleh@feddit.org
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                1 month ago

                Alcohol is a hard drug. The opiod crisis not being such a thing in Europe is a result of opiods not being downplayed and casualized like in the US, so the reason why the US has an opiod crisis and we have such an alcohol problem are similar. But you drew a line from casual alcohol abuse to somehow work against opiod problems. But more alcohol abuse doesnt lead to less opiod abuse or the other way round.

            • WoahWoah@lemmy.world
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              1 month ago

              What are you even talking about? The per capita death rates differ from what you’re posting (making up?) here. ​According to data from the World Health Organization (WHO), the death rate from alcohol use disorders in Germany is 9.2 per 100,000 population, whereas in the United States, it is 14.3 per 100,000 population.​​ That’s a substantial difference. Are you a recovering alcoholic or lose someone to alcohol or something? It’s fine that you are against alcohol, but you’re making false comparisons and citing false data to do so.

            • WoahWoah@lemmy.world
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              1 month ago

              Your own Wikipedia link puts alcohol dramatically lower than cocaine and heroin in terms of dependence and harm. Were you raised by alcoholics or something? If so, sorry, that sucks.

              • Saleh@feddit.org
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                1 month ago

                Social harm is much higher with alcohol. There used to be a graph plotting both social and physical harm, but it got replaced with the one you criticise, effectively stating the same thing. Alcohol in its effects for both the individual and society is a hard drug, like coke, heroin or meth.

                But the way you get defensive makes me wonder why aconowledging alcohol to be a serious drug with huge damage both to individuals and society is so difficult.

            • arglebargle@lemm.ee
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              1 month ago

              “its just one glass of wine” can be equally said with “its just a small bump of coke” or “its just half an oxy”

              No, not really. Each person is different, set and setting are different, circumstances can be different.

              In any case that silly graph you posted was made by:

              “opinions and judgment of 15 researchers, doctors, and a journalist. These opinions were exchanged and discussed during a 1-day workshop” … “given that it has no input other than the experience and knowledge of the participants involved, it is unlikely to be unbiased”

              Although to be fair, the group that made that study now is advocating ways to get medical cannabis and psychedelics to people, which is more or less in line with the graph I suppose.

        • Ledivin@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          We rightfully don’t accept casual consumption of cocaine or heroin around children.

          Disingenuous bullshit - there is no such thing as “casual consumption of heroin.” You can’t use heroin without getting high, but you can absolutely drink alcohol without getting drunk.

          • Saleh@feddit.org
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            1 month ago

            Yeah, not drunk, just a little tipsy, its just to take the edge off, just to relax a bit…

    • ZeroCool@slrpnk.net
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      1 month ago

      It’s strange here in the US too. I don’t know anyone that has a problem with that. That kind of puritanical attitude about drinking is not the prevailing sentiment here. Sure, my friends and I aren’t getting plastered at BBQ’s like we did in college, but it’s not like we aren’t having some beers at a cookout just because half of us have kids now. It’s just a vocal religious minority making a lot of noise. Don’t get me wrong, this country does have a different, more uptight, relationship with alcohol than Europe, but it’s not nearly as extreme as it may appear online and in media.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        It does happen though. My wife’s grandmother was an alcohol abolitionist. We’re not talking the 1800s here, I’m not that old. She died in the 2000s. But she was super religious and was part of a temperance movement.

        Anyway, once she died, the beer and wine started coming out at family gatherings and they have not turned into raucous affairs. The kids at the gatherings seem to be doing fine.

      • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 month ago

        This is a very large country, and the culture (alcohol in particular) varies wildly by location.

    • riodoro1@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      They need to protect the children from alcohol and trans people because then they get shot at in schools.

    • frickineh@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Nah, my Catholic extended family always had a jug of Carlo Rossi (garbage wine sold in gallon jugs, for those lucky enough to be unfamiliar) at every family gathering. No one was ever worried about there being kids. Evangelicals are just lame.

    • alliswell33 @lemmy.sdf.org
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      1 month ago

      Also Mexicans drink around their kids during social events all the time. It’s a joke in my family that the only reason adults put on parties for their kids is so they can drink with their friends.

    • Resonosity@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Bro it’s perfectly normal for Americans to do this too…

      I swear, the Twitter snowflakes want to use the lamest of dunks to own the Libs. Then they fail to realize that they might do this themselves.

      Aww, who am I kidding. Twitter shills don’t engage in family functions, or have kids for that matter.

    • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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      1 month ago

      This is a generalization. Lots of American families of all backgrounds can have alcohol during family meals and social time.

      People have drinks at birthday parties. At dinners. All of the above.

    • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      This is particularly American sensibility about not drinking alcohol casually around children

      Shockingly this will vary by family. Some families take their kids bar hopping while they drink to excess, some drink casually and not in excess, and some are sober around their kids, and some remain sober all the time. My wife grew up hanging out in bars with her parents biker friends and their kids. She learned to watch some of them and save the good homemade wine when someone was about to topple. I grew up with parents who would have a single drink with dinner one to two times a week and would avoid getting drunk (at least that I know of).

      Personally, as a parent and living in an area with a strong alcohol culture and with alcoholic family members, I drink very rarely (the alcoholic family members really kill my desire to drink), and when I do I make sure we have more than enough adults available to parent and drive if needed. I also am very much a lightweight so there is no drinking without getting noticeably giggly and sloppy. My wife feels and acts similarly but is not a lightweight and can realistically drink one drink and be visibly unaffected.

      I honestly think the OP is less about the presence of alcohol around children but more just calling out a wine mom as such

    • Jesus@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Unwinding after a shit week with a bottle of beer or glass of wine in the evening, with the extended family over for a meal, while kids play games. Tens of millions of Americans are doing this right now.

      I don’t want to live in the America where that isn’t normal. That shit is wholesome.

      • Kecessa@sh.itjust.works
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        1 month ago

        I don’t want to live in the America where that isn’t normal.

        Bad news! Vice squads are coming, no more fun for you!

    • BassTurd@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      As an American, I don’t know that I really see this too much. For Halloween, it’s not uncommon for some houses to give those little shooters to parents. Obviously it’s not good to get sloshed at a kid’s birthday party, but I don’t think too many people put too much weight on a drink or too. Either that, or I don’t put much weight on it, because I’ll have a social beer at noon on a weekday if it feels right.

    • PagingDoctorLove@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I was born and raised in the states and I’ve never experienced this. There’s usually beer or wine for the adults who want it at every gathering. The one exception is maybe baptisms but only because the reception is usually in the church hall. Maybe it’s a southern thing? I’ve never been to the south and they do have some weirdly puritan social beliefs.

    • Yprum@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      So many people trying to say it is normal in the US, but it is the US the one with the rule of having a paper bag to cover alcohol anywhere public. Sure at home it might also be more normal but that is already indicative of a certain point of view which I’m guessing is what OP was talking about.

      • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 month ago

        but it is the US the one with the rule of having a paper bag to cover alcohol anywhere public.

        No it isn’t. This is a state-by-state thing. Many states don’t allow you to consume alcohol in public, period. Some don’t care (I think Louisiana is pretty lax regarding this if I recall?)

          • WoahWoah@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            To make it even more complicated, counties, of which states are composed, can also set the terms of alcohol use in their jurisdiction. There’s “dry” counties all around the US where alcohol cannot be legally purchased.

            And then there are counties where public consumption is fine and prostitution is legal. So… idk. It’s a big country. Montana, just one of the states, is larger than Germany, and it’s only the 4th largest state. The largest state is over four times bigger than Montana.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I’m American, but Jewish. Wine is part of sabbath dinners. Especially during religious holidays. I was drinking wine at Passover seders when I was 8 or 9.

      Amazingly, am not an alcoholic at 47. I do enjoy a small glass of port in the evening though.

    • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      My brother and others in the family will 100% get drunk around the kids. Nobody is giving kids alcohol nor drunk driving (we have family parties at the family vineyard usually so nobody is driving away)

      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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        1 month ago

        My wife’s family will 100% get drunk around their kids, and drunk drive with the kids in the car. Seeing that first hand makes us really reluctant to drink at all.

      • lunarul@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Nobody is giving kids alcohol

        When I was a kid I always asked for a taste when my parents had a drink with the meal. It was just a sip and I never liked it and it burned (it was usually a hard spirit), but I still asked every time.

        When my wife was 5 she was being sent to the still to do a taste check and see if the brandy is strong enough yet.

        • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          exactly. That’s how I came.to hate beer! hahah Also wine is grape! that’s just nature. We don’t want drunk kids (can you imagine the caos?!) so we don’t let them drink but they have tasted and didn’t like it

    • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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      1 month ago

      Was always normal in my family. Smoking and drinking indoors all day. Used to come home smelling like shit. But there were alcoholics. Good people, though.

    • RBWells@lemmy.world
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      That is the way we had birthday parties too, and they are the best. Invite the whole family not just the kid. Nobody HAS to drink, and I didn’t because hosting, but it’s more hospitable to have adult beverages available. Often a “fancy drinks” area for the kids too, with colorful non alcoholic drinks and garnishes for them to create their own drinks.

      So, so much better than a house full of kids all the same age. Kids running around in packs, adults chilling.

    • Anivia@feddit.org
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      I come from Germany and drinking around children is normal here, and it’s legal for children to start drinking at 14 years old.

      However, just because it’s considered normal doesn’t mean it’s a good thing, alcohol gets played down way too much in our society, it’s one of the most dangerous and addictive drugs on the planet

  • AA5B@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Who leaves their wine glass on the floor next to excited kids? You’re almost guaranteed to be wiping up that puddle in ten minutes

    • SendMePhotos@lemmy.world
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      Omg one time I was in line at a Subway (food) this dude started small talking about how it sucks because he’s so hungry and he has to wait until he gets home to eat. I say, “why not just eat half while you drive?” he says, “what are you crazy?! You can’t eat while you drive! You will crash!” and went on this tangent about not being able to eat or drink anything because you’re driving.

      Thanks for unleashing this random ass memory.

      • Bassman1805@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        You could also like…sit down at the subway and eat your sandwich.

        A sub is a pretty difficult driving meal though, if you have any care for the cleanliness of your car. Lots of ingredients threatening to spill out of the bread at any moment.

        • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world
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          That’s why you get a nice clean sub like the meatball sub, with sirracha and chipotle sauce added to it. That way everything is just a red and orange mess.

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          1 month ago

          See, I disagree. I feel like a sandwich (and particularly, a long roll) makes it easier to eat without having to look at the thing you’re eating. It’s a great driving food.

          Unless we’re talking meatball subs or something. Just keep the paper on your lap (maybe put a napkin or two under that if you want to be sure nothing gets on your pants), and go to town without having to look down.

          Better than anything requiring utensils, that’s for sure.

      • The_v@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        In my state they ended up passing a distracted driving law that includes eating while driving. It’s a secondary enforcement law (they can’t pull you over for it).

        If you run a red light while eating a hamburger, you’ll get the primary fine (running the red light) plus another $100 fine for distracted driving.

        Why? because for some people taking a drink or a bite of a burger will make them crash. This is especially true in urban areas with a ton of things a driver needs to be aware of and react to.

        • Saleh@feddit.org
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          1 month ago

          I was almost run over by a driver at a crossing who was busy eating fries or something. She clearly didn’t know or care to pay attention and drive accordingly. Given her speed i most likely would be dead or in a wheelchair if i hadn’t stopped in the middle of the road. I will never forget the stupid expression on her face as she looked back up and didn’t bother to slow down.

          It doesn’t matter the kind of distraction. If you dont have both hands free to operate your car and you have to look at anything except the road and mirrors, you are distracted and have no business of driving. This kind of behaviour should always lead to people getting stopped and at least made to walk the rest of the day, getting longer bans with repeated offenses.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        one time I was in line at a subway

        It took me way too long to realize you were talking about a restaurant and I was trying to figure out why he couldn’t just eat while he was on the train rather than wait until he got to his commuter station and drove home.

      • Voyajer@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Dang how hard is driving for someone if they think drinking a drink while driving will make them crash?

        • fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          I’m actually all for this. If you’re driving your #1 priority should be paying attention to the road, and any distraction should be avoided if possible.

          The Germans had it right not having cup holders in their cars.

          • Voyajer@lemmy.world
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            I’m also in favor of generally minimizing distractions while driving as well but taking a sip from a cup with a straw should be effortless without having to look away.

            Germany also has much more strict requirements to get a license in the first place that I wish would get adopted where I live.

            • fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              1 month ago

              Taking a sip generally isn’t that distracting. But when the cup doesn’t want to go into the cup holder no matter what you do, and you have to look down to figure it out is.

              • Nurgus@lemmy.world
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                French cars have tiny cupholders that don’t fit any takeaway cups. My Renault is infuriating if I have either a takeaway or a mug. I’ve had to buy a particularly narrow thermos cup to fit it.

      • Artyom@lemm.ee
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        Eating a sandwich and drinking a coffee while driving are dramatically different. A coffee sip takes a second, you can almost certainly keep your eyes on the road the whole time, and you can easily put it down in a cupholder, freeing your second hand. A sandwich involves 4 layers of wrapping, possible sauce drippings, and a different surface to each bite that requires you to look. I’ve read studies that found that actively eating is as risky as being drunk behind the wheel.

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          Well I imagine you would unwrap the sandwich and have it prepped for eating before pulling away from the place where the sandwich was purchased… And you don’t need a different surface, you just keep the paper it was wrapped in on your lap, and put it on that.

          Do all of y’all really need to look down at your sandwich while eating it?

          Obviously, it’s more distracting than sipping coffee, but I would argue that sandwiches are one of the better driving foods. Far better than anything involving a utensil.

        • Saleh@feddit.org
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          And then you miscalculate your sip, or you have to break suddenly, so you spill hot coffee all over yourself. Now you are in pain and take both hands off the wheel and your eyes off the road, because you want to take your hot clothes away from you.

          Voilá you are driving uncontrolledly and are a mortal danger to anyone within the possible paths your car could take for the next ten or so seconds.

    • postnataldrip@lemmy.world
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      Saw someone making a sandwich once in stop-start traffic, cutting board resting against the (airbag) steering wheel and using a knife. Didn’t hear about them on the news that evening so can only assume Darwin missed it.

      • Naja Kaouthia@lemmy.world
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        Saw a guy eating Chinese from a takeaway carton with chopsticks while driving over a bridge once. It was mildly terrifying. Carton in one hand, chopsticks in the other.

  • Magnetic_dud@discuss.tchncs.de
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    one candidate must be perfectly immaculate and nit-picked on the smallest detail while the other can do and say what the fuck he wants

    • Dragonstaff@leminal.space
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      She drinks wine while playing with her niece. He steals from cancer patients. It all evens out. /s

      • Jiggle_Physics@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        And mustard, and arugula, and inconveniently timed salute, and, and, and, and…

        Spent a similar amount of time on this shit as him destroying Libya because they actually went to not accepting the petro-dollar for their oil. As soon as he was out though, that faded away and became a call back when they were running out of other BS. Further rhetoric, communique, etc showed that was actually what they would have done, but, ya, democrat did it. 🤷‍♂️

    • Karjalan@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      People who’s politics are their whole identity and just looking to dunk on “the enemy”

    • cheesepotatoes@lemmy.world
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      Ya… Some people have weird ideas about alcohol. Read a reddit post recently about someone complaining that their friends are constantly getting drunk around their kids. After extracting more details, the friends in question were drinking a couple of cans of beer over the course of like 5 hours…

      Mfer how much do you weigh that you’re “getting drunk” off a couple of 5% cans of beer? Like 80 lbs? Or does OP not understand how blood alcohol levels work and they think a single drop of beer == shit faced. Smh.

  • ryathal@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    Only psychopaths drink wine while playing games with kids. Normal people drink vodka with light ice in that scenario.

  • asteriskeverything@lemmy.world
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    I’m only the fun adult when I’ve had alcohol As in fun enough to play a game with a child and pretend it is a good time.

    …And bitch like Republicans aren’t the class of alcohol abuse…

  • Victor@lemmy.world
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    The only thing weird with this photo is putting a glass of wine anything on the floor next to kids playing games. That glass will either be spilled or broken.

  • EssentialNPC@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Yeah, this is wildly inappropriate. When I play board games with my kids, I find Old Fashioneds are the ideal way to deliver that numbing hit of booze. Wine requires too much fluid volume per unit alcohol, and the red varietals can stain your games.

    • Yprum@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Accused, but if I remember correctly it didn’t go further than that. And she was by far one of the best PMs I’ve seen working in many countries.

  • ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 month ago

    ITT: people who apparently despise spending time with their kids so much, that they need to drink to enjoy it.

    like WTF people…it’s not an issue to have a glass of wine (or whatever) while spending time with your kids. But it’s a fucking problem that you don’t enjoy it without it.

    • null@slrpnk.net
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      1 month ago

      ITT: people who apparently despise spending time with their kids so much, that they need to drink to enjoy it.

      ITT: someone making shit up and pretending it’s happening ITT.

      • WhatYouNeed@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Kids are exhausting? Really? Wow. Dont know what sort of kids you’ve been around.

        Kids haven’t forgotten how to have fun, they don’t anything including themselves too seriously, and they ask all sorts of funny and zany questions.

        As for drinking around kids: you never had a BBQ or get together with families?

      • ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 month ago

        Have you? Because this attitude is something I only see from people that either don’t have kids or spend any significant amount of time interacting with children in their spare time.

        And to answer your question, I have two kids of my own, neither of them require me to drink alcohol to enjoy their company.

        • Amanduh@lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          I have a child yes. Kids are fucking annoying to some people bro.

        • WoahWoah@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          No one is saying kids require you to drink. The idea that having a glass of wine while playing games with kids and other adults is very puritanical of you. Do you come from a family of alcoholics or something? You’ll be shocked to know many people also have an alcoholic beverage at dinner and their kids are there! 🤯

          • ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 month ago

            Did you even read my original comment? As I said, drinking alcohol around children is perfectly fine and normal…needing it to enjoy it, like several people mention or hint at ITT, is a problem.

  • ZeffSyde@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    The outrage should clearly be THAT SHE ISN’T USING A COASTER IT A TRAY AND THAT CHILD COULD EASILY KNOCK OVER THE WINE