They already have started doing that

This guy should have been our next president. That’s exactly the kind of outside the box thinking this country needs.

What a sweetheart you are. Can’t even let a webcomic get away with not being inclusive.

Christian tradition, sure, but the Bible doesn’t have much to say about nipples so any specific rule regarding them seems to be more of an inference than a command.

Why are both of these so veiny? Also, why does the word veiny and both of these pictures make me think of dicks? Am I the inevitable perverted product of an overly sexualized society or are these drawings intentionally evoking phallic symbolism? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?

When duty calls, we answer

How many of you disgusting perverts beat your meat standing up? I feel like this could be another version of the ‘wiping with toilet paper’ debacle where those on the standing and sitting sides can’t comprehend how the other does it.

That’s pretty clearly just a disclaimer meant to shield them from legal repercussions. They know people aren’t going to do that.

Doing it on purpose for self defense seems less bad to me than indiscriminately because we want to be more comfortable but maybe that’s a meaningless distinction.

That’s why I skip a few steps and wipe my ass with tree bark.

Oh no, you have to be inconvenienced on three holidays a year! Night owls have to drag themselves out of bed every day because some dickheads decided that every job has to start at 8 AM.

And you can get it all over with much sooner since you’ll probably die of heart disease at 45.

If you’re part of the beans on toast clan then you can still shush it. This is 10x the flavor of that survival ration. You would be lucky to have this masterpiece grace your mouth with its juices.

So they only forced everyone into their ecosystem for seven years and once they cornered their market they gave back the illusion of choice? That’s cool I guess but that’s explicitly the opposite of what I mean when I say freedom of choice, open source, DRM free, etc.

Yeah this guy is on some Apple fanboy shit if he thinks iTunes was drm free. Their shitty design for iTunes and decision to force you to use it despite it making the experience of listening to music much worse is the primary reason an ipod is the only Apple device I’ve ever owned. Freedom of choice and Apple have never mixed. That’s such a weird angle to take when describing them.

I think pre post-apocalypse is just the apocalypse. If you read the news these days that sounds like a pretty accurate description of the time we’re living in. We’re all just pretending it hasn’t started yet.

Hey now that’s not fair. AI can randomize your music playlists, summarize an email, write terrible code, steal others work, and completely invade your privacy.

What’s that? Oh, I guess you’re right, we could do all that stuff already.

Every once in a while they get faced with a line on a chart somewhere so unbelievably vertical that they have no choice but to look beyond next quarter. Power consumption going 10x in 2 years is one of those times.

He completed his transformation and became one with the desert in the form of a new type of semi-sentient cactus.

ketchep

What the fuck