“I got nipples on my titties big as the end of my thumb, I got somethin between my legs that’ll make a dead man come…”

Eh, I think this is overblown. If you buy one that’s sized correctly and fits well, it doesn’t really affect your breathing. Some brands suck and aren’t made out of flexible enough material around the chest (any where you can tell where the binding panel is on it by the texture) but not all binders are that bad.

I should be the target audience to get this joke and I don’t get it either. Am I supposed to fear stairs?

As a weeb, I have in fact done that.

I started getting gyros instead. It’s fast, as cheap as fast food used to be a couple years ago, and tastes better. Plus, it’s a local restaurant and not a national chain.

I don’t use it, but I’ve seen the video that a woman posted on LinkedIn of her sig heiling to prove that Elon didn’t make the “same gesture.” I’m convinced some people are just using it like regular social media, even if it makes them unemployable.

I like to put my legs on the arm rests. Sometimes if I’m sitting “normally” (not fully sideways) I put just one leg up.

My roommate is always complaining about his contacts drying or running out of new ones, and every time I cringe a little bit because I hate things touching my eyes. Even eye exams freak me out, but I only have to deal with weird things happening to my eyes when I get them. I’ve been trying to convert him back to glasses, but he won’t listen.

Bunnicula got him.

I’ve seen ones that were custom painted and they look significantly better. It doesn’t stop them from being dumpsters on wheels, but at least they look finished.

A company’s phone bot actually able to answer my questions properly? I’ve never seen it happen. You gotta scream the word “representative” multiple times or else it would put you through loops of utter nonsense. You can’t say it at a polite volume or else it will ignore it. You can’t just say it once because it will “argue” with you that it knows how to do things faster, which is never really the case.

They have reverse toe thumbs.

Everyone with this is one of my evil twins.

Ew. This is why I don’t like AI. It’s not always inherently bad but people use it and pass it off as their own work or cheat on tests. People who do this are lucky I’m not their boss. Using AI to do your training just means you’re easily replaceable.

I did all these cock push ups for nothing!