I don’t really do awful shit though like by choice. I have been doing and sometimes miss these times but I acknowledge the dead end it becomes.
I mean I don’t do awful shit for the sake of just doing awful shit anymore at least. I am a proper citizen now you know. If there’s awful shit to be done the reward must be adequate
Well maybe because I could have like narcissism or npd it’s pretty probable. Psychedelics revealed it to me many times
Or like that one - HPD
Lemme have some fun online from time to time
More psychedelics after today is in order though to balance this rampage so to say, they always recenter me.
At some point I will get a good grasp on this thing and enough data points. Gonna pop some stuff now and see how this experience relates to my internal psyche
Well then I am several people then because holy shit I change it week to week, day to day
Otherwise it would be boring yes
Yesterday was truly best person day, today is worst person day
I think it’s sort of built in tbh. I can’t remember when it wasn’t the case.
All the cozy stuff arson, animal cruelty and the things as a kid.
I just don’t have this sense you all neurotypicals have. And I only know because some drugs make me see a glimpse of it. Of this sort of warm feeling towards living beings. It’s very rare to feel this for me
It’s kinda nice but like it’s super ephemeral. But it all has its pros and cons
And you are right I don’t even understand friendship or why would I want one. Like I don’t get it it seems too much hassle to get things you can have without it
That is I could find easily people I could say it to but like they are disgusting and I ended this phase and no longer have a company of unsavoury types
Now I am a proper citizen, good, kind and all the stuff and my company consists of similar.
I am in lgbt circles now and even socialists so like not the best audience for this sorta talk lol
Frankly I don’t really care about systemic problems not genuinely so but wanted to write lotta words I cannot say aloud to anyone.
You see having someone to confide this stuff is rare usually I have to be acting. Weaving some personas
Just so occasion arises with some semi vaguely connected comic.
So I can just shower ya all with my deepest thoughts without any repercussions. Brutal honesty is what I miss sometimes that was always fun.
I usually am focused on my self improvement journey but once a week I get a cheat meal so to say. This is my cheat meal
Feels good but also is so socially bad lol but hey you have to let loose sometimes
It isn’t tho, that’s the thing. sounds too crazy and pretentious but I swear on my real estate that it is all true
This whole timeline is too crazy to be a random chance I am convinced we are in the simulation and someone like flipped a switch okay give that person this and this whatever they do. Yeah they should be by all means be dead or smh but we need them to test that hypothesis
After all I probably wouldn’t get away with all that if not for the early capitalism woes of eastern bloc that was more like a Russian mindset than western. Early birds get all the rewards. Ppl born today will probably have it truly fkd up and be brainwashed that it is all okay and just hard work and will be fine yeah lol no. All the fruits have been already picked. Only scraps are left and good luck getting them now without these magic 100% value appreciation per year thingies that happened in the past
Learning is just somehow easy for me I don’t know maybe it is skewing my perspective and everyone else must sit there for hours before they grasp stuff.
I just can do things in less time it feels like this sometimes at least and thus have to fill that time and get bored.
Maybe some other people would use that to meet more and more challenges and overcome them but I for some reason always had more nihilistic and cynical mindset.
School always seemed so stupid, uni too. You can learn that stuff in a month by yourself more quickly and efficiently if you felt like you wanted instead of feeding dopamine scrolling phone.
I don’t think education system here was made for me in mind let’s just say. Not for someone who always questioned everything but never got answers but only reprimands and yelling and tons of bad behaviour notices.
I was always surrounded with people who worked hard and I just waltzed there scoring with no effort making their work sorta pointless that probably changed me for the worse.
So yes I don’t relate to these comics or most of the things really except for adhd meme comics yay. Most people are super unrelatable for me anyway.
Few who were, we used way too much substances and done way too overboard things (such as vandalism mainly) to keep them around in a healthy way. If I meet someone I relate to it is the best and worst thing that can happen to me and everyone around as we literally destroy places in a drug fuelled madness and get away with it somehow. In a fun company I have been shooting road signs out of my balcony in the middle of a city with an air rifle for whatever insane reason. Or throwing eggs at the cars while laughing like a total insane person. Can’t say I regret any fun times.
One time we were at someone’s house we just grabbed as much wine as we could from the cellar and ran. I shouldn’t miss those times but I do.
It was such a blast, adrenaline fun and laugh and on top of all stolen shit tastes super good.
But I can’t do this because we live in a society and all and I have this carefully built image and double life would be such a pain in the ass to maintain so I must decide on a single image that makes it all most fun and comfortable and pleasurable.
What’s least relatable is that I am focused on chasing the fun while everyone else seems to have these grandeur problems that seem contrived. Partner left them? Find another one then and the like. People are not relatable at all. Sometimes they even feel more like some npc characters, background noise. Hard to realize they are beings with their own autonomy and the like, goals, dreams. Impossible to grasp it even. They are 2D most often sort of.
All I know is that I could easily ignore grades, score good on final test twice in lifetime and leap over all those who worked real hard whole childhood and get to best uni. That kinda changes your perspective.
It’s about putting little jolts of effort where it matters and connections matter vastly more than anything. You can have idiots earning lotta because they know how to party with CEO or know their secrets.
Besides all your hard work matter shit all if you can’t market yourself and that is stretching the reality to your favour no matter the base facts.
I am retired right now at 30
I can’t relate to those things ever.
Who cares about grades when you are able to do anything at this age and not land in the jail? Once you are 18 the fun is over and you must be really careful at all times which is boring as fuck. Use these years to the fullest
Can someone finally make a comic that is an ounce relatable?
What do you guys even pursue with these grades of yours with all the bootlicking and effort when simply knowing right people and making them believe in certain version of yourself trumps everything
Are you really so naive to believe that hard work matters? No it is all about connections, knowing right people in right places. You can work hard for 30 years and have shit all but someone knows a certain guy at the top and is your boss in a year.
This is life, adapt or… struggle. The things they tell you in school is all horse shit the real race is in the casinos, nightclubs and parties. Remember that before you feed your kids with bs that good grades will make them successful.
And yet people routinely associate politeness with being ‘good’. Hell women are/were teached to be polite to be seen as good and pure.
Fuck politeness, world is a fucking brutal place and it is already hard to tell friends or foes apart much less if they smile as they stab you in the back. Tell me to my face what you think of me and I will do the same. This is simple and good method, 100% accuracy instead of some fucking games.
In my experience it is more probable for a genuinely good person to come off as rude. They usually don’t care about masks or appearances, they have their set of rules they stick to and nothing to hide. People who play appearance games are inherently lying since first meeting meanwhile if they are honest and straightforward I will respect them.
Politeness is like a smokescreen you have to really put some serious effort to tell what kind of mfer is on the other side. Many times a racist or the like and then you are surprised oh but they were looking so polite and pure.
Worst are fucking Christians jeez how many times those ‘good’ and ‘pure’ cunts turned out to be a total menace I cannot count. Full of love and all that bullshit at the same time
Colour me fucking skeptical if someone presents as pure and polite after the age of 17. At that age you have already seen enough life to know how it all works
I meant it’s better to have assholes who help you as friends than people whose only good quality is politeness. Excessively polite people are suspicious in my eyes as it is easy to hide your true self behind nice words
Talk to him till he is still young and malleable. People sometimes transform into the worst and if that happens only thing I can do is walk away with regret I didn’t nudge them before
It’s kinda funny how they think this is what safety is about in AI while they are closed monolith aiming to monopolise the market and have unlimited power that could potentially reshape everything. Of course it’s just for PR but still an ounce of dark comedy.
They could one day rule the world in some AI techno-feudalism but at least the model is family friendly and politically correct.
This is the polar opposite to the rough, autistic but generally net positive niche internet communities. Am I gonna call you a retard, yes but I wish you best and will support you.
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My cat: I pissed three times on your stuff while you were away because fuck you and your shitty ‘healthy’ food
Same evening: cuddles? cuddles! cuddle me human, yes scratches behind the ears!
Maybe because no one would green light testing of it
We are fine with torturing monkeys but the human babies whole facility would be burnt down and ceo crucified
I do this little trick where I change .webp to .jpg
I do this little trick where I change .webp to .jpg
It may not be obvious from the shit I typed here but I am trying to. I know perfectly well how fucked up it all probably sounds to someone of… more healthy constitution.
It’s like sort of a cheat meal let’s type deepest shit online and see what happens, maybe something good and whoah there’s you with some valuable insight.
Okay now I won’t say I am happy for you because that feels like total lie but I wish you well