OK, next step would be stopping your stupid immune system attacking your β-cells.
It depends on the pasta (form, freshness, self-made… etc). Some has to be stirred 3-4 times others just once, in my experience.
I add both oil and salt in the very beginning, because there’s no reason to not do that.
If you really like to impregnate your pasta, so that it won’t absorb your sauce (or less well), then you are right about the there-is-no-reason-part in your answer.
I don’t think it was a joke
This joke is about, how dog owners don’t speak out trigger words, when talking to other humans, to not over agitate their dog.
Mary: “Hey Sam, how about we go take a …”
Sam: “Pssshhht, don’t say it!”
Mary: “Ah ok. I meant we take a W. A. L. K. later on”