This is a terrible take. Obviously, I can say something offensive to a friend that they would find funny exactly because they know I don’t mean it seriously.
Saying that is some kind of “reflection of my true self” is honestly just dumb. I’m saying the offensive thing because I find it offensive myself, and because I would never say it to someone I don’t trust to understand that.
This is an over generalization. How can you support that this is true other than for yourself alone?
Sometimes the unfiltered things I discuss in private are for the purpose of getting feedback. A brainstorming space without any of the regular inhibitions censoring free thought. I’m not looking for affirmation, but genuinely want to see what the unfiltered feedback would be, and am ready to change my option on a dime.
Take this to the next level: you do this in your own mind / imagination before you speak. You think things that you don’t say. So is everything in your mind, even things you think are wrong and choose not to express, your true self? And you should be ashamed of shameful thoughts?
Also what do you even mean by “true” self? If I act differently around different groups of people, which one is true?
To the people who think what OP did was completely normal and something everyone does, (and I hate to use this phrase) check the “ratio” here. Nobody thinks this is normal. You and OP are in the slim minority spewing vile shit about people in your lives. It’s cruel and childish. You’d be smart to learn from OP’s predicament before you find yourself in the exact same situation with everyone you know hating you because you thought it was perfectly normal to constantly trash talk them behind their back. It’s not normal. Not everyone is doing it. Assholes like OP and apparently yourself are doing it. And it clearly can bite you in the ass. As I said in my initial comment, these kinds of things can have serious real world consequences. So you may wanna wise up and start being a respectable human being ;)
He posted nudes of his ex, among other things I’m sure at the same level of taste and class.
Can we stop twisting ourselves in knots trying to make fabricated and abstracted situations trying to engineer this to a situation where the people who originally shared terrible things are somehow morally justified? When you’re shitty on the internet, and let other people see your shitty shit, shit is going to come back on you. It’s your fault, you made a mistake. Period. This isn’t deep or hard to figure out.
You don’t even have to be the bad guy here, you can do everything right and STILL end up fucked over because you didn’t take care with what you post around other people. Learn to be smarter. Get gud.
If you’re sharing it privately, that’s your true self, the version of you unfiltered and able to avoid the consequences of actually saying it.
Not if, but when it gets exposed by a Derek, will people look at you differently?
You just discovered something important about yourself.
This is a terrible take. Obviously, I can say something offensive to a friend that they would find funny exactly because they know I don’t mean it seriously.
Saying that is some kind of “reflection of my true self” is honestly just dumb. I’m saying the offensive thing because I find it offensive myself, and because I would never say it to someone I don’t trust to understand that.
This is an over generalization. How can you support that this is true other than for yourself alone?
Sometimes the unfiltered things I discuss in private are for the purpose of getting feedback. A brainstorming space without any of the regular inhibitions censoring free thought. I’m not looking for affirmation, but genuinely want to see what the unfiltered feedback would be, and am ready to change my option on a dime.
Take this to the next level: you do this in your own mind / imagination before you speak. You think things that you don’t say. So is everything in your mind, even things you think are wrong and choose not to express, your true self? And you should be ashamed of shameful thoughts?
Also what do you even mean by “true” self? If I act differently around different groups of people, which one is true?
Gonna share this again
This commenter said it best:
He posted nudes of his ex, among other things I’m sure at the same level of taste and class.
Can we stop twisting ourselves in knots trying to make fabricated and abstracted situations trying to engineer this to a situation where the people who originally shared terrible things are somehow morally justified? When you’re shitty on the internet, and let other people see your shitty shit, shit is going to come back on you. It’s your fault, you made a mistake. Period. This isn’t deep or hard to figure out.
You don’t even have to be the bad guy here, you can do everything right and STILL end up fucked over because you didn’t take care with what you post around other people. Learn to be smarter. Get gud.