OK, there’s actually a banana to my left, but I already did that today

I believe in you

Well, safety first

I’m assuming that that’s the “before” photo

The “after” would be the same, but with matted fur

That’s probably for the best

Sometimes we need to touch the flame to be reminded that it’s hot

We feel the warmth, but only by committing to the burn can we truly know how things are

There were reports of teenage boys becoming so conditioned that they would get an erection when they heard a modem dialling

The internet has always been about porn

The first ever image digitally transmitted was a playboy centrefold. “The Lena”

Always kept short and clean

I hope every single person who has, or ever will, buy a cybertruck a lifetime of misery and misfortune

May they stub their toe on every step for the rest of their life

Too little, too late

Edited

Because Texas is a dumb place and Musk won’t act unless he’s forced to

Whoops! Tennessee!

Autocorrect. My phone confused one stupid state for another stupid state

Congratulations on being a part of the problem

“Four Girls Finger Paint” was an equal, not a sequel

It would definitely be unpleasant

No

But some glitter definitely comes through, as well as methylene blue

You’ll shit smurfs

It’s funny to dose someone’s coffee or coke with it, because they’ll pee green

The corruption is the whole point

'Murica is broken. It always was. It’s just now public

Well, Tesla ain’t a great car company, that’s for sure

Their products are shit

Sometimes, dreams do come true

On a horribly hot summer day in Australia, I’ve been known to hang out in the vege section of the supermarket for the misters before heading off to buy deeply unhealthy things that taste better